The Distant Storm
~MidnightMuseings
========================================================================
Summer, 30 years ago, Keichi, Yamato Prefecture.
I like some things just the way they are. The gentleness of the wind, the dampness of the moss, the black depths of the well. The buzz of the cicadas on tress.Your presence beside mine. The cut-up watermelon on the ceramic plates, the gentle ring of the wind chime. I like all of that.
The world seems kind, peaceful. It almost makes me forget about others. Seems like just we are there, sitting on the porch. You don't say anything. You have come after a long time. I don't remember the smell of the wildflowers that grow in the nearby mountains where we used to visit on such a day every summer. I had asked you if you would like to go there. But you asked me instead if I had anything to eat.
So I sliced watermelon with my kitchen knife. Its sharpness cutting through the melon silently. You sat on the kitchen chair, looking at me. I had cut melons a million times before. I am a melon seller for goodness sake. But in all these years never had my hands trembled so much, or my wrists became so stiff. Never had I felt so much chaos inside me. Brewing, dancing across the brim like a liquid in a witch's pot, bubbling, just under the surface. The redness of the flesh inside me matched the redness of the melon. Its surface glistening in the afternoon light. Outside, in the distance a hawker's frail sound was present.
You told me you would leave for Tokyo in some days. Your university application had been accepted. You told me that you would be going off to America in your third year at the university. I stayed silent. The cicadas also kept silent. But the wind was there. So were you. Silently removing the strands of hair it splayed on your face.
We were both born in the same village. Keichi, it was called. Keichi fishing village, the town banner proudly presented to whoever made their way to our small village. We both went to the same middle school and then you moved to the city for your high school. I never finished middle school. Helping out father in the shop took precedence over reading novels as I reached the age of fourteen. You used to send me novels, secretly, throughout your high school years. Every Wednesday the postman would come through the back gate of our house and hide the mail besides an Inari shrine. I would go there, and like a child who has received a birthday present, I would open the mail to find novels.Kawabata,Hemigway,Mishima and so many more.I would wake up at midnight when both mother and father were asleep. I would light my candle and read those novels. Before next Wednesday came, I finished the novel and on the last page of the novel, I hid a small sheet of paper with my name written on it.
Kitamura Jin.
When the next novel came, you would again hide the same piece of paper with your name written on it, beside mine.
Nakamura Akal.
Your name, in our language it meant a "Red pear tree". When we were still in middle school, we had planted a red pear tree at the backside of our house. Over the years that pear tree grew and now we sit under its shade, sharing the melon. You used to come every day to water it. Wearing a sunhat which was too big for you. Still, you looked pretty, like a sunflower with big yellow petals you too sparkled with the sun. I watched you as you watered the plant with your little elephant-shaped sprinkler.
Time is so cruel. It leaves us scarred. But it also endows us with memories, of kindness, softness, and love. I am broken from my trance by your touch. I see your lips moving and you asking,
"Jin, are you ok?"
I simply nod. You seem to be worried. The creases in your forehead darken as you ask me again if I am hiding something. I tell you it's nothing. You don't pry anymore.
"I know what you are hiding, Jin" you say looking at the two mating dragonflies.
You then look me into my eyes, into my soul. Into the very depths of well where lies a cold and silent heart. I feel that heart but there is no beating to it. It is cold, it is distant and it is increasingly cloudy. The waters of the well are pierced by the splash of a bucket. The bucket reaches the heart, gently scooping it from the bottom of the well. Someone is pulling it to the surface. Someone peaceful.Someone beautiful. It grows restless. Not wanting to leave. But some part of me is curious to see the heart. To pry it open and see if there is still some love left.
"You don't want me to leave for Tokyo, do you?"
I feel my blood rush to my cheeks. I feel the cold heart rising from the bottom of the well. I see your light engulfing me like a mountain which is engulfed by the mist on a cold morning. I feel the need to protect myself. To push you away. To not let you know the reason why that cold heart was in the bottom of the well. Why, when the time came for you to leave Tokyo, I cried more than the time I lost my mother. The wind is slow, the heat is beating down on us. Small flies slowly surround the melon. I look into her trying to defend myself but nothing comes out of my mouth. So I look away. Because I know if I look at her too much I will lose myself. I take a deep breath and tell her that I am fine with her leaving for Tokyo. That she should pursue her dreams and move to America if she wants. I try to lighten the mood by telling her to send me a gift from America once she is settled in. She smiles at me, knowing how hard I was trying to cover up my feelings. Isn't that what men are supposed to do. To do the right thing no matter how hard it is. To protect our loved ones and help make their dreams come true. To be selfless, to be respecting. That is what I was told. What I was meant to do. But with her, things were always simple. The rules were not there and love flowed like the Keichi river. Deep and fast.
"Why are you lying to me Jin?" she said. She seemed to be disappointed in me. Like she had caught me stealing her favorite novel from her bookshelf. She looked away but grabbed another piece of melon and took a bite, chewing it silently with melancholy.
"Jin, I have a favor to ask from you".She asked if she could stay the night at our house. I was a bit taken aback by her request. Not that she had not stayed over before but ever since she had left for the city, she never stayed at our house for more than a few hours. I happily obliged and she seemed happy. But behind those white eyes, there was a fear. Of What I could never ascertain.
We had deep-fried fish, miso soup, salad, and rice for dinner. We rarely had guests at our house so everyone was happy that she had decided to stay over. She told father that she had to leave tomorrow in the morning as she had to catch the train to the city. I told her I would accompany her to the station. She thanked me and fell back to answering my father's questions.
The night came and soon we headed to sleep. I took out the extra futon for myself and decided to let her sleep on the bed. As we settled in small droplets of rain started to come down. I blew out the oil lamp and darkness fell and what came next was a dream come true.
I woke up in the middle of the night. The rain had intensified and now the lightning struck in the distance. It was then I heard her. Eyes closed but her lips quivered silently. She seemed to be having a nightmare. She was always afraid of the storms that struck at this time. I went towards her bed and lay beside her, curling her up in my embrace. She seemed scared, afraid but she seemed to be soothed by my presence. I put my hand on her head, running it through her hair. She sighed, a sort of relief washing over her. I stayed silent, without moving as I comforted her.
"You will make some girl very happy one day,...Jin" she woke up. I was a bit scared to have silently crept up on her even though it was to comfort her. I tried to move away and get back to my bed but she held me in place. "Don't go, please. Stay with me", she brought her hands on my back and pulled me close.
"Just for tonight."
She peered into me. Her brown eyes seemed like the well in which my heart sunk to the bottom. Pitless, shapeless, formless but the waters of the well were warm and soothing.
"I read somewhere that we humans are hermaphrodites. We were once one like a lump of clay. But as time wore on we were separated into two. God made us into two different human beings. We were born in different families, leading different lives and wanting different things. So much so that almost nothing between the two humans remained the same. But it is said that when both of them come close. When they talk, share memories. They start to seep into one another, their souls connect." she placed her hand on my chest, right above my heart. "and if they are blessed, they finally become one."I sat with her silently, watching her, listening to her, praying for her. I had thousands of things going through my head but all of it came down and rested in one question and it was a question I knew the answer to but I wanted to not know. "That is what I feel when I am with you...Jin.I feel like I am with my other half. That I am whole. That all the suffering that I had, all the wounds I have, all the tears I have shed over the years are worth it.Because.." her voice quivered.
" because it brought me you"
.And finally, I saw the cold heart reach the surface of the well. It was red and it was beating and I found Jin.
We melted into each other.Hair,skin,lips,teeth,bone,blood,sweat,tears.What flowed and what smiled I don't know. I kissed her. Kissed her liked I would lose my life if I am separated from her. Behind my mind, I scolded myself, repeatedly. It had taken me so long to see Akarl. Yes, Akarl.
I mumbled her name in my throat and she mumbled mine in hers. I plunged her into the bed, wanting her. We finally detached to get our breaths. She held my face, her hands were soft and warm like the hot springs of Hokkaido. She smelled of Lilacs and sakura blossoms. We quickly undressed each other. We tried to not make much noise but the heavy rain outside gave us the solitude we needed. For some time, we simply lay with each other. Our hands exploring each other's bodies, feeling each curve and muscle. Her breasts were pressed against my chest, nipples slowly hardening as she became more and more aroused. Her nectar slowly started flowing and as I touched it started to flow profusely. She moaned at my touch and I in hers. She placed her hands on my penis, slightly massaging the shaft as her other hand found the tip. My breath quickened, coming in small puffs, the room grew warm and the world grew silent as we filled ourselves with moans and desperate wanting. She slowly slid down my body towards my center of pleasure. She rubbed her face on my belly, kissing my navel as she went down. She circled around to my penis, looking up into my eyes to see if I wanted to do this. She got her answer and circled her lips on my shaft, sucking it lightly, the vacuum from her mouth took away my precum, into her throat from where came moans and sounds of lust and want.
I repeatedly said her name "Akarl, Akarl, Akarl", and each time I did she slipped deeper into me. I was a bit terrified by her want but was comforted by her need. She bobbed her head up and down like the hands of a samisen player. I felt my seed rising, making its way to find her. I warned her but she just increased her ministrations. Gently cupping my balls as her other hand stroked my shaft. And finally, I exploded into her. I thought I was about to pass out, thinking that this was the height of pleasure I could survive but I was soon proved wrong as she stroked me faster, I moaned and heard the lightning flash across my window, my voice, silenced by the roar of the storm.
As the sensations ebbed away I saw her lay on my chest. Breathing silently. I asked her how she felt. She curled her head and brought both her hands and rested them on my chest, she facing towards me. I saw a drop of my essence beside her lips and rubbed it away. But before I could she took hold of my hand and put my essence-covered finger into her mouth. I moaned slightly at such an erotic act, I could feel her strong tongue slurping away the essence. I pulled my finger out and put it in my mouth, tasting her saliva once again. She smiled and leaped at me. Covering my face with her bosom. We both laughed and smiled and shared a deep and passionate kiss. Now that the need of both of us was fulfilled, it gave way for love to flow.
We didn't talk because we didn't have to. We knew each other. Not from this lifetime but from the last thousands of years we had shared. We reminisced about our middle school and the red pear tree that we had planted. And as the morning came we both drifted off to sleep.
I woke up after some time to feel the bed to be empty.
She had left without even talking to me. On the desk, there was a piece of paper and a pear from our tree. On the paper it these words was etched.
"Kitamura Akarl"
I wept by my bedside.
Autumn, Present, New York, USA.
I woke up with the incessant ringing of the FedEx delivery boy. I had told him so many times to not come in the morning. But that simple thing did not seem to go through his thick skull. I got to the door and literally barked at him.
"What is it?"
"Hello, Mrs. Kitamura.Your delivery."He said smiling.
"How many times have I told you to come at night. I get one day off the whole week and even on that day you come and ring the damn bell so early in the morning."
"Sorry, Mrs. Kitamura but today's delivery consists of fresh produce so I had to deliver it in the morning," he said. His smile had gone at my screaming and now I was feeling bad for the boy." This will be over in an instant, can you kindly sign here and here" he said sheepishly. I signed and he was about to leave when I said "Wait here, Daniel. I will be back in a second."I grabbed my purse and took out ten dollars and gave it to the poor kid.
"Take this. And No I won't take no for an answer."I said smiling at him. He kept on refusing to take the money but took it once I gave him a stern look.
"Thank you so much, Mrs. Kitamura"
"No problem kiddo. Sorry, I shouted at you."
"No..no Mrs. Kitamura. I understand completely. Have a good day."He left smiling.
Mrs. Kitamura huh, I chuckled to myself. The wedding ring on my finger had tightened. I only wore it when I went outside or to work. I came inside with the package. Taking off the ring, I opened the package. It was a watermelon. I rummaged through the package like a madman finding a pear and a piece of paper. The paper was brownish. Like it was really old. The creases in the paper were distinct and it had a light smell of grass on it. I opened the piece of paper and saw his handwriting and I broke down in tears.
On it was written.
Kitmaura Akal.
Nakamura Jin.
19 November 1991."
http://dev.muvizu.com/forum/topic4696-unstable-charactersr.aspx
http://dev.tcm.com/tcmdb/title/798177/heart-and-soul-the-life-and-music-of-frank-loesser/
http://dev.usw.at/manual/php/faq.languages.html
http://devagacoes.blogspot.com/2005/01/
http://devaginaavagina.blogspot.com/2010/06/especial-betty-page.html
http://dev-lady.biz.ly/devladyslists2.html
http://dexterlim88.blogspot.com/2009/04/air-gear.html
http://dexterlim88.blogspot.com/2009/04/code-breaker.html
http://dexterlim88.blogspot.com/2009/04/historys-strongest-disciple-kenichi.html
Комментарии
Отправить комментарий